How to Keep the “Next on Deck” Interested

Last Updated 27.10.2022
2 min read

So, you are in a current relationship. So, you are not sure if it will work out, or you are just someone who likes a “change of scenery” often. There’s nothing wrong with that if this is the lifestyle that satisfies you. To make sure that you move quickly to a new relationship, though, you will need to have a “next on deck” person in the wings, and, more important, keep that “next on deck” interested while you test the waters of your primary relationship. Just how do you manage this? Here are some thoughts.

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Table of Content

    You Can Cookie-Jar a Side Squeeze

    If you have never heard this term before, here’s the short version. You have a side relationship as a “just in case” fallback. You keep that relationship private and give that person just enough attention to keep them hanging on. This is not too nice and can be tough to juggle. For example, you really can’t be seen in public locally, so you have to take that side hustle out of town for actual dates. And you have to make excuses why you have not introduced that person to family, friends, and co-workers. After a while, your cookie jar squeeze may get wise and dump you. Then you have no backup. And really, does it feel good to treat someone like this? 

    You Can Get on Dating Sites and Establish Digital Relationships

    The thing about using online dating sites is that you have your pick of lots of matches. Plus, your activity on these sites can be private and confidential, so your primary will not know what you are doing. You can connect and chat with several matches at the same time, and if you use the geolocation feature, they will be physically close by for easy hookup when and if you are ready. Keeping these several potentials interested will take some time, though, as you will have to continue the chatting 

    Any of these online dates could be your “next on deck” – pretty convenient, no?

    Maybe You Have an Ex in the Wings

    This can apply whether you are now in a long-term relationship or if you have been inf;’ a series of short-term relationships. You will have at least one ex, if not more.

    Recycling an ex can work in some circumstances, so long as that ex has not blocked you from any communication. You can begin communicating with that ex, even while you are in your “now” primary relationship. You can check to see if any of your exes are currently unattached and if they might be interested in re-kindling something.

    If you are in the process of recycling an ex, begin with some casual and confidential meetups – maybe for lunch or a drink. Try to get a handle on their feelings for you. And keep things casual but regular for when you may be in need. It might just work.

    You Can Be a “Player” if This is What You Want

    So, you don’t like being in-between relationships. After all, it’s no fun hanging out alone, and it’s tiring looking for someone new, right? So, keep those side possibilities in the wings however you can, even though it may keep you a bit busy. You’ve got a streamlined process, using any or all three of these strategies, so you won’t “miss a beat.”

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