Fortunately, it’s easy to get things going again. by experimenting with some new lesbian sex positions. If you are willing to try some new things, you may find that sex is more fulfilling, and that you look forward to getting it on with your lover.
Lesbians And Penetrative Sex Myths
When the topic of lesbian sex positions comes up, so do the many myths surrounding lesbians and penetrative sex. These truly run the gamut, and that impacts the perceptions that people have about the best lesbian sex positions.
If you talk to some people, they believe that all sex must culminate in some form of vaginal or anal penetration. Not only is this wrong, but it is also an extraordinarily heteronormative and ableist view of sex.
Weirdly enough, another myth is that lesbians don’t do penetration at all. Somehow there are people who believe that you can’t enjoy deep penetration and be a lesbian.
If you’ve bought into any of these myths, be prepared for an education. These lesbian sex positions absolutely prove that women can enjoy all forms of sex with one another.
Things to Have on Hand
So, you want to experiment with sex positions. In that case, it’s good to come prepared. This is a great time to bring out the sex toys and lube. If you want to enjoy penetration, better find a strap on that both you and your partner love. Also, get plenty of pillows. They provide extra support and better access.
A Special Note About Anal Sex
Anal sex can be amazing if you go slowly, pay attention to your body, and listen to one another. Also, be sure to use a separate dildo or strap on for anal. This prevents transferring bacteria that could make you sick.
Missionary Position
Missionary isn’t often associated with lesbian sex, but it is actually quite popular. Think about it. This is a laid-back, intimate way to enjoy sex with someone. Add in a strap on if you want penetration, or simply enjoy kissing and grinding with your partner’s body.
69
When it comes to mutual oral sex, 69 is a “nice” option. For the unaware, this position involves your bodies facing one another, but your head and feet pointing in opposite directions. You will have perfect access to your partner’s vulva, and she to yours. Use a pillow to avoid straining your neck. If you get tired, then you can try the next alternative!
Sideways 69
This one is exactly what it sounds like. It’s simply a more relaxed version of the standard 69 sex position. In this option, you and your partner simply lie on your sides to enjoy mutual oral sex.
Doggy Style
With doggy style, one person assumes a hands and knees or knees and elbows position. The other person comes up behind them. From that vantage point, they have perfect access for anal or vaginal penetration with a dildo or strapon on.
This is a great position for many different sexual tastes. Enjoy wild and fast sex, BDSM, or just a casual round of sex that both of you enjoy. Just be aware that you may need to make some adjustments, especially if one of you is much taller or shorter than the other. The person on the bottom may need to kneel on a cushion to get up higher or spread their legs to give a shorter partner better access. Try adding a vibrator to the equation for some amazing external stimulation.
Are you topping? Don’t forget to drive your partner wild by kissing and nibbling on their neck and shoulders as you penetrate them. Feeling kinky? Indulge in a bit of (consensual) hair pulling or just a little dirty talk.
Queening
This is the classic, face sitting position. In fact, it is so popular that you can buy queening chairs. However, most people are just fine with having their partner sit and straddle them. If you want to be the receiver, have your partner lie on a bed or on the floor so you can straddle them comfortably.
Up Against The Wall
A wall is a fabulous load-bearing surface for some amazing lesbian sex. Have your partner face away from you with their legs spread, using the wall for support. You then come behind them for some intense strap on sex. You can also engage in some really kinky oral like this.
Are you feeling particularly athletic? Turn them around, and have them wrap their legs around your waist. But, only do this if you are comfortable supporting your partner’s body weight.
If you are the receiving partner, use your partner’s hand to help you reach orgasm.
Spooning
Are you the big spoon or the little spoon? Either way, spooning isn’t just for cuddling. It is the perfect position for the person who is the big spoon to use a vibrator or their fingers on the little spoon. Be sure to switch things up so that both of you can enjoy the spooning position equally.
Mutual Masturbation
This isn’t a position exactly. However, you can definitely enjoy lesbian sex by engaging in mutual masturbation. Try laying down next to each other. You can both use your favorite sex toy. If you want a more intimate experience, you can face one another, even intertwine your legs. This will allow you to be close enough to kiss and see each other’s genitals.
Straddle
Start by sitting in a very sturdy chair or on the floor. Have your partner straddle you facing forward. Your partner’s legs should be on either side of your body.
Now you have some options. Try a double ended dildo so both of you can enjoy some internal stimulation. You can also use your fingers or a vibrator to offer some pleasure as well. Most people find that this is a great position for some nipple play.
Cowgirl
Cowgirl is similar to straddle. The difference is that one of the partners lays down flat, usually with a dildo or vibrator. The other climbs on and rides that sex toy like a cowboy.
You can also try the infamous “Reverse Cowgirl”. Here, the person on top does everything described above. The difference is that they are facing away from the person at bottom.
Cowgirl is quite fun. It gives the person on top quite a bit of control. The only drawback is that the cowgirl may get worn out quickly! It takes a lot of physical energy to ride a partner. Consider chasing this sex position with a nice massage.
Edge of Paradise
The edge of paradise is one of the more flexible lesbian sex positions. One partner sits or lies on a bed, sofa, or table, very close to the age. The other partner can then offer oral pleasure, penetration with a sex toy, manual stimulation, or the use of a vibrator. If the laying partner wants to enjoy penetration, the standing partner may need to kneel. The person sitting on the edge of paradise may also need to use a cushion for their own comfort and accessibility.
Talking About Positions in Lesbian Sex
Trying new positions is an amazing way to make your sex life exciting. You get to try new things, some of which may really improve your ability to enjoy sex. However, it is extremely important that you communicate with your partner. If you are into a new lesbian dating relationship, talk about what you prefer and why. This will help you find the best lesbian sex positions for both of you. As with all relationships, communication is just critical.
Which Lesbian Sex Positions Are Best?
This really depends on what you like. Some positions are ideal for oral sex and clitoral stimulation. Others are perfect for penetration. The best lesbian sex positions will be fulfilling for both you and your partner. For example, a face sitting position can be amazing if you are into BDSM, but it doesn’t have to involve any sort of domination. A position with your partner facing you is often more intimate.
Ultimately the only way to judge lesbian sex positions is to give them a try. It’s fun to experiment, and the worst that can happen is that you switch to something that works better for your partner’s body and yours as well.
Best Lesbian Sex Positions by Category
If you aren’t sure which positions to try first, it can help to think about the preferences you already have.
Best Lesbian Sex Positions For Penetration
If penetration is your thing, you are probably always on the lookout for positions that allow you to enjoy long, intense, lovemaking sessions with your partner while also maximizing comfort.
Try missionary. It’s a comfortable classic. Doggy style works well if you love intense, deep penetration. Finally, give the receiver some control and the giver a break with cowgirl or reverse cowgirl.
Best Positions For Oral Sex
If you are okay with pleasuring just one partner at a time try queening, edge of paradise or up against the wall. If mutual oral is your thing, 69 is the best lesbian sex position for you and your lover.
Positions For Better Sex For BDSM Fans
BDSM includes bondage, domination, submission, temperature play, blindfolding, spanking, and other activities that allow partners to experience pleasure, intimacy, and excitement through power transfer.
While any position can be part of a BDSM experience, some are particularly effective. These include queening, your partner on all fours, cowgirl, and up against the wall. Don’t be hesitant to introduce toys or try roleplaying to mix things up.
Intimate Lesbian Sex Positions
Are you interested in using sex to create a deeper, more meaningful connection with one partner? If so, consider positions that allow you to face your partner, kiss them, and engage in as much skin-to-skin contact as possible. Straddling, missionary, and 69 are both ideal ways to engage in intimate queer sex. It’s perfect if you want to be able to look at your partner’s face.
Inclusivity And Lesbian Sex Positions
It’s important that conversations about sexual positions are inclusive. Not everyone who identifies as a lesbian has a vagina. Other women need to use their bodies differently because of the disabilities they have.
In any case, it is important to discuss different positions that can make sex accessible and pleasurable to everyone. Many lesbian and bisexual women facing these challenges have found ways to adapt these positions to meet their needs. Additionally, if you need help enjoying a fulfilling sex life consider speaking with a sex therapist with expertise in this area. There are also products available to help you try new positions and otherwiseΒ enjoy queer sex regardless of physical ability.
Additionally, trans and nonbinary lesbians should communicate with each other about how they want to experience sex. For example, a trans woman may not feel comfortable in sexual positions where she takes a traditionally masculine role.
Try Some New Positions!
Let’s be honest. This list barely scratches the surface. Feel free to experiment with any of these. Then, really expand your horizons. There are books dedicated to showing dozens of sex positions. Yes, the Kama Sutra is the most well-known, but there are dozens of others. Purchase one, and give a few new positions a try. You may even find a few that are queer sex friendly. Even better, use your imagination and come up with a few of your own. You and your partner can follow a sex educator online to learn more about your options.
Is it Time For a Professional?
If you try new positions but struggle to achieve the intimacy you want, it may be time to contact a sex therapist. These are professionals who can help with both the physical (orgasm!) and mental (intimacy) aspects of sex. They will help you and your partner go over your struggles, and give you a few things to work on. A good sex therapist will provide you with tools and insights to get the most out of your sexual relationship with your partner.
Your sex therapist will also facilitate important but difficult conversations between you and your partner. For example, if your partner lays during sex and isn’t very responsive, you may have to work out a strategy to deal with your different sex drives.