What's the best way to get to know somebody in a new relationship? Ask them a few questions. Then, be prepared to field some relationship questions in return. You will learn quite a bit about one another, learn if you are a fit for a serious relationship, and have a bit of fun. After all, isn't it better to get to know one another on a deeper level? It certainly beats lame small talk about whatever you are watching on Amazon Prime.
The point of asking questions for a new relationship is to become familiar with one another. It's okay to talk about some serious stuff, but you should also consider setting a few ground rules. This is probably not the time to drag up unresolved traumas or compare your current situation with past relationships. Instead, maybe find that happy medium between, "What do you like to do for fun?" and "Exactly how many people have you slept with?" Also, whatever you do, avoid that weird and sexist love language question.
Now for those amazing questions for a new relationship. Do you have a future with the one you are dating? It's time to find out if your ideals and values are in-sync. Let's gooooo!
This is one of those great questions to ask to learn more about another person's social circle. It can also provide great insights into what is important to them in a close relationship. Ask them how long those relationships have lasted. It's always interesting to learn how some people keep friendships alive for decades. You may uncover the one thing that draws them to others.
Yes! Holiday compatibility is a big deal! What if your tradition is a big family gathering? What if you have visions of sharing a future with boozy holiday parties, but your partner doesn't celebrate. What if they see holidays as a waste of money?Are you willing to have separate holidays for years? This is one of the most important questions to ask!
You can learn quite a bit with this deceptively simple question. How your partner fills their downtime can influence how you spend yours.
First, do they have downtime? Now, what do they do with it? Is their idea of a great weekend knocking out a remodeling project, then running a 5K? That's great if you are super active. It could be an issue if your idea of peak weekend life is day drinking and a three-hour brunch on Sunday. Not a deal-breaker though! A fit partner could be a good influence.
This is just a lightweight question, but it can help make some interesting conversation. It also gives you a bit of understanding about the other person's likes and dislikes. This is great info for gift-giving occasions. If you know their favorite scent, you can select the ideal cologne, lotions, candles, and other items.
Yeah, this one is definitely intense, but think of everything you can learn! This includes:
How they handle conflict
If they have strong opinions
What issues are relationship deal breakers for them
If they are the family peacemaker
What issues will make them
Whether they are ride or die with their family
Then again, don't make too many assumptions. Remember that what someone might tolerate from family isn't what they would tolerate from a partner.
Weirdly enough, people lie about this quite frequently. Even if that's the case, this is still a fabulous relationship question to ask. Why? Because it still reveals so much about an individual and their character.
Do they immediately answer with a guilty pleasure romantic comedy? They could be telling the truth, or they don't want you to know about their weird and quirky movie tastes. If they hem and haw before mentioning the name of some obscure art film, they may be trying to impress you with their sophisticated tastes.
This can get dark, but it is definitely a great conversation starter. You will certainly learn more about their past life.
How does your partner see themself? What makes them comfortable? Do they put fashion and aesthetics before comfort? Whatever the answer, we just know that life is different with a person who would wear heels and one who would wear sweats.
Translation: Are you a bit of a germaphobe? Are you a bit obsessed with cleanliness? In all seriousness, this one is just not that deep. But it is a fun question to pose on a boring, rainy day.
First, it's so amazing when someone has a favorite teacher. It's even better when their answers are touching. This is also a great segue into fun questions about favorite classes, and other interesting tidbits.
Does your partner know how to treat themself? Do they value their own health and wellbeing? The point of this question isn't to see if someone is high maintenance. It's to see how well they take care of themselves. That is an important indicator of self=worth.
It is probably a little intrusive to ask them if they are happy with their life. However, you can ask them if they are happy with their lifestyle. The answer may be interesting.
Is your partner happy right now? Do they envision a future that looks much different for them? How do they feel about it? What are they doing about it?
Are they most content spending time with family, clubbing with friends, or just relaxing in front of the tv? Is their idea of contentment the same as yours?
This seems frivolous, but it truly does reflect personality. Don't you want to know if they are a black coffee from the gas station person? Who knows? Maybe a "fair trade, fresh ground, French press with lavender syrup" can find true love and marriage with a "Whatever's on sale with extra sugar and milk".
Does your partner value giving back? How do they do that? Is there a potential for both of you to give back together?
A question about your favorite thing is always fun. Also, steering the question towards food keeps things light yet interesting. Are you dating a foodie? Do you have similar tastes in food?
Is music a passion? Ask about their favorite love song!
This is another, lighthearted question to help you get to know the other person better.If they are a cat fanatic while you are a dog person, it's also a way to see how they handle a fun life debate on a very easy matter.
Does travel matter to you? It may be good to start a conversation to see how the one you are dating feels about it as well. Get them to describe how they experience visiting other places, or why they aspire to do that.
Is career and money important to them? No judgment either way, but it is a compatibility point.
Someone who has only had long relationships may have marriage and kids on the brain. It can be helpful to have them explain where they stand on this.
All of us have a first infatuation. It can be fun to discuss whether it was unrequited.
Not everybody views sex and intimacy in the same way. It's super important for you to bring it up as a topic for discussion. Then, listen to what they have to say.
What is your five year plan? If you are interested in marriage, it might be a good idea to find out where they want to live.
Just another effective conversation starter. It can get them talking when the conversation dies off.
Yes, this is a fun question. It can definitely help new couples engage in some interesting conversation. However, don't be afraid to ask this as a way to gauge how the other person feels about money. If this is someone you might live with or marry one day, it's important to know this.
Be ready to answer this question also. Would you donate to charity, give some to a friend, save it, invest it, or have a fabulous time?
Now you've got some great questions to ask to see if you are both on the same page. But, this is a date, not an interview. You aren't a journalist, and probably shouldn't just start firing off a series of deep questions. That's a great way to turn a new relationship into an ex relationship.
First, keep in mind that although we have given you 25 questions, you don't have to ask every single one of them in a single night. Maybe just sprinkle one or two into the conversation.
Another approach is to ask questions that are relevant. For example, if you walk past a pastry shop, mention that you love the smell of freshly baked bread. Then, you can ask them about their favorite scents.
Try making it a bit of a game. Challenge them to ask you three interesting questions, then pose your own funny or romantic questions. It's a great way to get to know each other with engaging and entertaining questions in the early stages of dating.
We get it. You have some deal breakers, and you don't want to waste time on a new relationship if you and your new partner will never be on the same page. It seems awkward to ask tough questions though. Now, what do you do to determine if your relationship is compatible?
The truth is that some things just shouldn't be revealed through questions. Instead, your best approach is to simply be honest. Talk about your values, and what is important to you. For example, if you just can't date someone with strong religious beliefs, you need to communicate that. You don't have to bring these things up at first sight, but definitely don't wait too long.
Now, you have some questions to ask. Enjoy some quality time with your new partner, and learn a few new things about them. The right questions can make date nights interesting, and give you an idea of where the other person stands on many important topics.
Worst case scenario is that you find you aren't compatible for a romantic relationship. You could remain friends (or not). If nothing else, you might have some interesting stories to tell about dodging a bullet.
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