This is exactly why it is important for you to have some topics planned in advance, in case you can't brainstorm at the moment. In order to help you out with that, here are some good topics to talk about on a first date that will keep the conversation going.
How to Bring up a New Conversation Topic
First and foremost, something you need to keep in mind is that you should not make this seem like an interview. Asking someone you just started dating questions about themselves should come naturally in the conversation and it should not feel forced.
It is completely normal to ask a few questions more directly sometimes, especially when you notice that the communication stops flowing as effortlessly. This is especially important if either of you is more introverted and has a hard time continuing the topics.
The best way to achieve this is by thinking of how to continue the conversation when you see it ending. For example, if you have just asked them about their job and you have also shared things about your own, think of where you can shift the topic next.
A great idea would be to mention that you didn't always want to do this, especially when you were a teen. You can then talk about your ambitions when you were smaller and you can mention a few things about your hometown. This can easily shift the topics to you talking about where you come from.
The important thing, especially if you're more introverted or shy, is to practice a few of these ideas in advance. Think about how you can connect different topics and how you can get to know them better through talking about different things. This way you will be more prepared for awkward times and keep the conversation going.
Questions You Should Not Ask on The First Date
While you are probably looking for question ideas to ask the person you will be going out on a first date with, you should also keep in mind that there are quite a few things you should not ask someone on a first date.
These can be rather personal or difficult to answer, and you should wait a little bit until you get to know them better. Personal questions are good but you should always set a limit on which question takes things too far and could possibly make them feel uncomfortable.
First of all, talking about how many people they've slept with or been with in the past should always be off the table. Not only asking them such a question will make things uncomfortable, but it could also make them feel disrespected.
Along with that, you should probably not ask them how come they're still single or if they're on any dating apps. Since it is the first date between you, you should also not ask them if they have gone on any more dates recently or are seeing anyone else.
Unless you met on a dating app, this question is not the most appropriate thing to ask. Not only does this imply that there is something wrong with being single, but you might come off as controlling when asking something like this on the first date.
The questions you ask should sound personal without making them feel like you're evading their space too much. If you wouldn't ask a question you have in mind to someone you already see as a friend, you should probably not ask your date that either.
Talk About Where You're From
One of the most common things to talk about during a first date is where you come from. This is an easy way to get to know more things about one another and keep the conversation flowing without trouble.
You can ask them about where they grew up, how big the city was and what was their life like back home. This will be a great opportunity to learn more about their family life and how they were growing up.
There are so many things to discuss where you come from and you can find a lot of common things in your upbringing this way. Some questions you can use for this topic are the following:
How was it growing up in a different city?
What are some unique things about where you come from?
How long did you stay at home with your parents?
How do you get along with your parents?
Are you close to your siblings or other family members?
Do you have pets back home?
Who were your closest childhood friends?
Talk About Things You Have in Common
When making small talk, you can always introduce topics that don't take a lot of thought to come up with or answer. These first-date conversation starters can be short yet can help you learn a lot about a person and how they click with you.
Having things in common is a good sign you can find things to do together. Every relationship should start with the two of you being friends above all else and having many things in common will help you achieve that.
This can also be a sign that your personality is pretty similar to theirs and that you see many things the same way. Of course, you can't agree on everything, but the idea that you will always find things to do with the other person is very nice and inviting for every potential relationship.
Some of the things you can talk about when it comes to this topic are the following:
Which are your favorite tv shows?
Talk about your favorite music. Have you ever seen your favorite band live?
What do you think about sports?
What is a deal-breaker for you?
Dating is about finding out who you are and who others are. If you show up in a masquerade outfit, neither is going to happen. – Henry Cloud
Ask Them About What They do For Fun
Another thing that can help you find things you have in common and see whether your interests align is knowing what the other person likes to do for fun. This can also give you ideas on how to plan your second date and make it a memorable one for them.
Whether they enjoy spending time with their family, following a new course online, or watching movies, there are many things you can discover for one another and do together for fun.
It is also great to remember that their hobbies can introduce you to new hobbies you will also enjoy. This will bring you on the same page, help you spend time with one another and plan more dates for the future in a fun way and without you having to guess what they enjoy doing.
Which is your favorite way to spend an afternoon at home?
What is the most spontaneous thing you've ever done?
What movies would you binge-watch during a weekend?