Thank God we are totally past this now. Sex toys are common, widespread, and in use by people of all sexual identities – binary and nonbinary – virtually anyone on the straight or LGBTQ+ spectrums. And most anyone can find a local sex shop or one online to explore all the possibilities.
Given the new explosion of popularity, sex toy designers and manufacturers are continually introducing new and unique products for all possible scenarios. And many of these scenarios relate to gay men. Gay sex can be amazing anyway, but the addition of sex toys for gay men can take sexual encounters to new levels that bring the most pleasure and even absolute bliss.
So, for all you gay men out there – this one’s for you. Here you will find the latest in sex toys for you and your partner to consider and try out. Buckle up buttercup and enjoy this journey.
The Amazing World of Gay Sex Toys
You may think that gay sex toys are limited to the butt, and for a long time, they were. But there’s so much more that you and your partner can experience with so many more. In fact, reading through this list should spark lots of gay chat among lots of partners. So, let’s unpack all the types of these toys. As you read through these, let your imagination roll and think about how they might give the most anal sex pleasure as you enjoy your gay life.
Butt Toys
This is by far the largest category of sex devices for gay men. Why? Because that is the way penetrative sex occurs, and unless they masturbate themselves or each other, or engage in oral sex, this is a very pleasurable orgasm.
Butt sex involves preparation, and for those who are new to it, it will be painful without that preparation. Here’s the deal. First of all, the anus has an internal and an external sphincter muscle. They are very tight, expanding only to push out poop. The other thing is that the rectum does not lubricate itself during arousal. There are toys that can help you get ready for anal acts:
The Butt Plug
These are made of all types of materials – metal, silicone, PVC, and glass. The simplest butt plug is rather short and is meant to get the anus used to having something in it and to relax around it. Using butt plugs is the most popular activity to get ready for the ultimate anal pleasure and can actually bring about arousal.
There are variations of butt plugs too.
- Longer butt plugs can be inserted to help the internal sphincter relax. Leaving them in for a while and practicing relaxing around them trains your anus for the real thing
- Rotating butt plugs can give a unique sensation and even result in orgasm
- Expanding butt plugs are just that – once inserted they expand, sometimes by a remote-control device, and you can see how much you can ultimately take.
- A tunnel plug is open-ended and is designed to expand the anal canal and then allow the giver to go through that tunnel to achieve pleasure at the other end.
Butt plug practice helps you train your anal sphincter to relax as you demand rather than only spontaneously when you are pooping on the toilet. And you may find that butt plug use will bring you pleasure all on its own. As you get used to one size, gradually go to larger sizes, in order to train your anus to open more. For a beginner, the Colt Anal Trainer Kit has three graduated sizes – you might want to start with it.
Dildos
Coming in all sizes, dildos can be used either for training or for solo pleasure. Even with a partner present, using devices on each other can be pretty erotic and good foreplay for the final act. Dildos are the most common sex devices because both women and men use them. Over the years, they have evolved into a myriad of shapes and styles.
The Standard Dildo
This is the earliest dildo adult toy, shaped like a penis and now made of rubber, silicone, or even metal or glass. For newbies to anal penetration, there are smaller sizes (both length and width) to use for easy insertion in the beginning. Size can be enlarged gradually.
But these devices have evolved just like everything else. There are now lots of varieties for both solo and dual play.
A Double-Ended Dildo
Here’s a dildo that comes from a less-than-common position – partners that want to go cheek-to-cheek. Typically, these dildos are at least 18 inches long, with a penis head at each end. Partners can get on their hands and knees with their butts facing. They then each put an end of the dildo into their butts and move in coordination. These either make a great prelude to the real thing or can mimic the real thing until an orgasm is reached.
Double Fucker
Double-fucking is a real thing. While it may require lots of gyrations and an anus that can be stretched to its max, there is such a thing as two men fucking the same butt at the same time. If you don’t want a threesome, though, there’s a dildo for such a double-header. This can happen in two ways. You can buy a double-fucker dildo, or your partner can attach a dildo to his penis. Either way, you are guaranteed to fill full with this double penetration.
Cock Extenders
This is one of those adult devices that will provide sexual adventures for the receiver but not the giver. The cock extender is a device that the giver slides over his dick. It can add both length and width, some of them even adjustable while fucking, some adding vibration or rotation, and some adding a little warmth. Ain’t technology great?
Goose Head
Here’s a great tool to prepare an anus for fisting. Yes, fisting is a real thing and can actually bring amazing pleasure. If you can’t imagine someone’s fist up your ass, then think again. Imagine your fingers scrunched together, with your thumb underneath them. It sort of looks like a goose head – thus the name. The goose head dildo is a good workup to eventual fisting, which must happen gradually, considering how much that anal cavity will have to open. Some of these come with a suction base to put on a wall so you can back up onto it, or even put it on a toilet seat and sit down on it.
A close competitor is “The Intimidator” produced by Amethyst Adventure as part of a 3-part training and pleasure kit. This bad boy is 11 inches tall and is placed on a hard surface (wall or toilet seat) via a suction base. It starts small but tapers out to a four-inch circumference. Anyone who can take this is ready for anything.
Anal Hook
For the BDSM lifestyle, here’s a fascinating metal tool. It has a ball on one end, and then a curved metal bar in the form of a hook that extends a nice length. The ball end goes up into the anal cavity. The end of the hook which is then sticking out can be attached to a chain, rope, or cord, and then to the submissive’s leg, arm, wrist, or neck. Every movement will then trigger the movement of the ball up in the cavity. This is really soft torture at its best.
A Speculum
Here’s a sex toy that comes straight from an OB-GYN’s office. It is used to spread the vagina for inspection and to get a tissue specimen for lab work. It became popular for medical scenes in the porn industry, and, more recently, for some kinky gay fun. The speculum is inserted into the butt and then spread open. This allows a partner to look into the anus cavity, or then put other substances in. A partner can piss into it, or pour/insert other substances – milk, honey, whipped cream, beads, etc., and then partner control is exchanged so that both can enjoy the fun. The speculum is best inserted with the receiver lying on his stomach and then bringing up his knees in a spread-out position so that the anus is easily ready for insertion of the tool.
Ovipositor
Okay. this one you may not have heard of. An ovipositor is a hollow tube that a female fish or insect uses to inject her eggs into a male host, for gestation. Now, the sex toy market has gotten onboard and crafted ovipositors for fun anal play. The hollow plug itself is made of flexible material, and slurpy gel eggs come with the toy, or they can be made. The eggs are the size of chicken eggs. The tube is inserted into that anus, and then the eggs are pushed through. The idea is that they will be ejected naturally (they’re pretty slippery). And that ejection can be pretty erotic. These are not all that common to find, but Primal Hardware carries them, along with accessories – it’s called a “splorch” on their site.
Inflatable Dildos
While the Colt anal trainer kit gives the buyer three different sizes of dildos to train that sphincter for larger penetration, an inflatable dildo does the same but with just one. The typical inflatable toy begins small when inserted. It is connected to a pump by a small hose. The pump is used to inflate the dildo until the receiver can no longer “take it.” Over time, and with continued use, this bad boy toy can ultimately prepare a partner for fist sex. Even as a solo tool, this can be one of the best sex toys out there for both training and pleasure.
Other Butt Fun
Plugs and dildos are not the only erotic pleasure-making anal toys for the toolbox of a gay man or couple. Check out some of these other butt pleasures.
Ass Hammer
This is a great tool for either self-pleasure or something that couples can do to each other. The hammer is a metal rod with balls welded onto each end – of two different sizes. Depending on the ability of the anus to stretch, either the smaller or larger can be inserted high up into the anal cavity. Then, grabbing the other end, the ball can be pushed and pulled as rapidly as possible for a great butt fuck. The caution here is this: don’t use the large ball unless your cavity can stretch fairly easily.
Ball Chains
Ball sex can be highly arousing and can even result in orgasms. In short, a series of balls, attached by a “chain” of some sort, is inserted into the anal cavity, usually pushed up as far as possible. Then the balls are pulled out, one by one, usually slowly. Have a partner insert them and then pull them out. A variation on this is to have a partner suck them out. That suction adds even more eroticism.
Anal Beads
These are variations on ball chains. Anal beads are attached by a string. One of the most common types of anal beads is strings of pearls, used both by women and men. Pearls or beads come in various sizes, so pick your pleasure and graduate to larger beads as that muscle allows. Some manufacturers produce rotating beads (via tiny batteries) that can even be activated by remote control, providing a variety of rolling and vibration speeds.
Moving on to Nipples
Everyone knows that a woman’s nipples are highly erotic, whether they are massaged, licked, pinched, or lightly bitten. But a man’s nipples can also provide pleasure during sex, and the use of a good toy while other things are going on can only enhance the pleasure (especially if just a small amount of pain is involved.)
Enter Nipple Clamps
Before the sex toy industry heated up, men just used clothespins for their nipple arousal. But now, there are some pretty sophisticated clamps that are even adjustable, depending on the amount of pleasure (or pain) you want. Most have a small screw on the side to tighten or loosen the amount of grip.
Enter the Tit Suction Toy
This device clamps onto your nipples and suctions it in, enlarging the nipple until the right amount of pain or pleasure is reached. The toy can be released or unscrewed when finished. Again, this suction toy is for men who find nipple play erotic, and they allow a partner to be hands- and mouth-free to do all sorts of other things.
Nipple toys can usually be found at a local sex toy shop, so try that before going online to order them.
Now the Main Course – the Cock
The dick, of course, is where the ultimate pleasure is achieved, as people reach their orgasms. Here is what sex author and gay man Alexander Cheves has to say about the relationship between toy and cock sex.
“Nothing will ever replace traditional sex — sex toys simply expand the experiential buffet of sexual pleasure to its true, limitless margin.”
But sometimes, even cocks need a little toy pleasure or enhancement, whether someone is solo or with a partner. The goal for all of these toys is for the cock to reach its ultimate goal – orgasms. And here are some toys that will help a man get there.
Cock Rings
These come in all materials for a soft or hard feel, depending on individual taste. Their purpose is to tighten up the base of the cock, so that blood flow is trapped, keeping it hard and somewhat enlarged. So, let’s take a look at the types of cock rings out there.
Standard Cock Ring
This is simply a ring that is pushed down to the base of the dick – all types of different materials but is kept there to keep an erection while it all happens
Metal Cock Ring
These are a little controversial because, unlike other materials, there is no “give.” The key is to be certain it is not too tight and to be sure that it is put on with lots of silicone gel for easy removal. Otherwise, you may end up having to have it cut off.
Combo Ring and Butt Plug
There are lots of these on the market. Basically, they connect the ring to a butt plug. These can be worn 24 hours a day if desired, but they are best used when you are going to have a great time with the added enjoyment of feeling something in your butt while you do.
Combo Ring and Ball Stretcher
Again, there are plenty of these out there. If you have never experienced ball stretchers before, the point is to have some pleasure/pain during the act. The scrotum is highly sensitive. Ball stretchers are usually in the form of sack-type devices that enclose the scrotum. There are then weights of different measures attached to those sacks, depending upon how much pain gives you pleasure. Ball stretchers can be purchased as standalone devices too. Find your sweet spot of pain, and you can be taken to new heights.
Vibrating Cock Rings
Here’s a great addition to the pleasure you can get. This cock ring has a tiny, embedded battery that can be turned on or off by an equally as a tiny button. Buy a vibrating cock ring and try it out. Some swear by these. And since the base of the penis is so close to the prostate, the vibrations can act as a prostate massager too.
So, what is the best cock ring to use? It’s a matter of personal choice, of course.
Increasing Stamina
Nothing is worse than to be all ready and perform badly either because you can’t keep it up or because you can’t keep from premature ejaculation. In both cases, your partner is dissatisfied. Consider these to remedy the problem
A Stamina Training Unit
This cool device simulates a vagina or an anus, so is used by both heteros and queers. The idea is to give you practice so that you can have a bigger, harder dick that will also last longer so that your partner reaches orgasm too. It can also be used for edging practice, something that can take you and your partner to new arousal heights.
Penis Pumps
These are designed for men who have a problem with size and/or keeping an erection. A penis pump is a suction tube. The penis is inserted into it and actually grows. There are mixed reviews on these, but it’s worth a try if you have this issue. Good ones are pricey.
Jacking Off
Of course, you can use your hand to jack yourself off when you are horny and need release. But where’s the fun in solo play when you can jack off with your partner or use some of the newer tools that increase the sensation – far better than your hand.
Sleeve-Type Devices
There’s a whole variety of these tools, depending on the “feel” you want. Most are adjustable for pressure and speed. They even have vibrating and rotating ones. and many are disposable and come pre-lubed.
Double Jack Off Tools
You and your partner may want to jack off together. In this case, you can use the sleeve devices at the same time. Or you can get a tool that is open-ended on both sides and is longer so that both of you can fit inside. There are lots of positions for this type of tool but standing or kneeling are probably the best. Again, these come in lots of varieties if you both like rotations or vibrations, or a good tight fit.
Sounding Rods
Now here’s a kinky choice for cock play, when you are into a bit of pain/torture and are bored with the other stuff you have done. These rods are thin and made of metal and are inserted into the urethra of the penis. They are painful, but if pain arouses you, they are worth a try. They come in sizes, so choose the thinnest one first, and do it with someone. If the pain gets to be too much, they can pull it out quickly.
Prostate Massager
The prostate is a gland that is located just in front of the rectum and behind the scrotum. It does respond sexually to massage, and there are lots of devices that will serve as a prostate massager, usually connected to a butt plug or a cock ring and butt plug combination toy. There are standalone devices, though, and if you find that your prostate is really erotic, then getting a prostate massager will be a good option. They come in levels of vibration and speed too.
A Few Final Thoughts
Cleanliness and Safety
Even the best toys get old, break down, and, of course, get dirty with each use. And if you use silicone toys, using silicone lubes is out of the picture. They will break down those toys and leave crevices where bacteria can lodge. Usually, warm water and antibacterial soap will do, but toys must be cleaned after each use.
About Those Lubes
No sex will be pleasant without lubes – anuses, fingers, toys, and penises do not self-lubricate. Do a close search of ingredients as you make your choices. You want to avoid parabens and other unhealthy chemicals and find those with the right Ph balances.
The Wrap…
The world of gay love has come a long way. Partners can engage in all sorts of sexy play, providing hours of bliss to one another, and the use of gay toys factors heavily into that bliss. Find those that you and your partner(s) and don’t be afraid to experiment with some of the new high-tech tools.
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