Your Polysexual Dating Guide

Last Updated 25.07.2022
4 min read

So, you have identified as a polysexual. And you are pretty clear about what this means for you.

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In brief, you are sexually attracted to multiple genders. This does not mean that you are poly-romantic (romantically loving more than one gender) or pansexual (being sexually attracted to all gender identities). Fortunately, in our liberated dating world today, you can pursue polysexual relationships without stigma, so long as you know what and how to go about it. Here is a dating guide for poly-sexuals that should help make dating successful.

Where to Find Potential Dates?

As a polysexual, you may want to date someone of the opposite gender at certain times. This doesn’t make you “straight.” If you are a woman, you might want to date other women; if you are a man you might want to date other women, men, or pansexuals at any given time. Being polysexual is all about who you are attracted to, not who you are dating.

So where will you find dates? Well, you’ll find them in the same places most other people do. 

  1. All-inclusive LGBTQ+ dating platforms will probably be your best friends. Here you can identify as polysexual, state your current preferences and change those at will. This will be the most non-judgmental place to look for dates, and your matches will be those who are fine with your sexuality.

  2. There are online and local chat rooms and support groups. You may find your own ‘matches” there

  3. You can go to bars and clubs where your currently preferred genders hang out – not always the safest, but good social gatherings to “test” your attractions.

Your Dating Behaviors – Anything Goes

You get to choose who you are attracted to at any time and everything else about your dating behaviors. Not only do you get to choose your dates, you get to choose the types of relationships you may want with any of them – simply hookups, casual but maybe repeated dating, long-term dating on a more serious level, etc. For example, you might be in a monogamous relationship and choose to have sex with someon’e else who attracts you. (You do owe your monogamous partner honesty, of course).

You also get to choose the types of sexual activities you want, so long as there is mutual consent. And don’t forget you can also choose your dating environment – as a couple, threesomes, foursomes, whatever.

If You Use Dating Apps, Set Up an Engaging and Honest Profile

You can capture plenty of interest on dating apps if your profile is honest yet interesting and intriguing.

Take some time to research and review examples of great dating profiles (they’re all over the web) and try to fashion one that will be just as great.

Be certain to present yourself as a polysexual and specify the genders that typically attract you. Be sure that you provide photos that show your involvement in hobbies and interests, even a few suggestive ones that meet the standards of the apps.

Once You Receive “Mutuals” Start Swiping

Choose those you feel attracted to at this time and begin conversations. You can always go back and “undo” those you rejected or change your preferences. The most important thing, though, is that you are honest and open about the dating “environment” you want, including the types of sexual activities that turn you on.

There are Do’s and Don’ts as You Date

  1. Don’t be an “attention-seeker.” And never exaggerate your experience or your sexual prowess.

  2. Remember it’s not all about you. Any dating partner you choose, no matter for what type of arrangement, has needs and desires too. Honor those and find compromises if they differ.

  3. Be certain there is mutual consent for any type of sexual behavior and environment you want.

  4. If you are in a monogamous relationship, be certain that you honor the boundaries that are set by that primary partner as you pursue your polysexual behavior.

Being a Successful Polysexual Dater

Poly-sexuality is all about discovery, diversity, and fluidity. Most of all, though, it is about attraction – what other genders turn you on sexually and how you go about dating those genders. And might your preferences change? Absolutely. Just be true to yourself and honest with those you date.

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