Surviving The Pain Of Being Dumped

Sometimes that statement leads to something good, maybe a planned vacation. Unfortunately, it’s often the first thing somebody says to you before they dump you. That’s always an awful experience, no matter if they try to soften the blow or not.

There’s no way around it. It sucks to get dumped. Fortunately, there are ways to survive the experience. Even better, you can emerge a better person and handle the situation with grace.

Okay, maybe not. But, you can definitely get through a breakup without seeming like a pathetic simple or complete psycho.

Accept Their Decision And Their Reason

A person’s decision to break up with you is something they own. You don’t have to agree with it. You are welcome to think their conclusions are absolutely wrong. What you can’t do is deny their right to feel however they do.

So, don’t argue. Don’t plead your case. Don’t beg, and don’t put them in the position of having to argue their case with you. They aren’t obligated to do that, and we promise you won’t hear anything that is helpful to you.

Examine But Don’t Engage in Self-Denigration

It’s always healthy to take an analysis of your behaviors and choices during a relationship. That can help you make positive changes. What isn’t healthy is to beat yourself up and allow yourself to feel worthless. It’s also more than a little manipulative to turn a breakup into a downward spiral so that your former partner feels guilty or is forced to worry about your well being instead of moving on.

Lean on Your Friends And Family For Support

You may be tempted to isolate yourself. It’s perfectly fine to do that for a while. Sooner than later though, you’ll get over things in a healthy way if you stay connected. Let people know what’s up with you. Try to stay in contact. You may not be in the mood to go out and party, but it might be helpful to grab a cup of coffee with someone.

Don’t Fall Prey to Awful Post-Breakup Decisions

Please, for the love of everything good in the queerdom, do not become that person. You know who they are! They’re the one who leaves their friends worried and baffled at the choices they make after a breakup. Need some examples? Check These out.

Don’t Stalk Them on Social Media

It probably doesn’t hurt to take a social media break after a difficult breakup. At the very least block or hide your ex. Don’t make yourself a mess by following their every move on social media. More importantly, don’t make a scene of fighting with them or begging in a public forum like Facebook.

Don’t Bother Their Friends

Never press an ex’s friends for information or insights. By all means, don’t ask them to run interference for you.

Don’t Get Involved in an Unhealthy Rebound Relationship

Yes, rebound relationships are real. No, it probably isn’t love at first sight. Yes, you are going to break up with the person you rebounded with. This will just make you sadder and lonelier.

What’s the best way to avoid a rebound relationship? That’s easy! You wait. Any relationship you rush into will probably be a mistake. Additionally, don’t make extreme choices. That includes dating someone who is entirely the opposite of your usual type.

That kind of decision won’t get you a functional relationship. It will just get you into a relationship that is bad for an entirely new set of reasons.

Lean Into Your Hobbies

It absolutely helps to stay busy. If you have a hobby or passion, this is the perfect time to get as involved with it as possible. Learn to oil paint. Go antique shopping. Do puzzles. Play the SiMs for hours at a time. Get out of your house, and go see a concert.