Sex is a big part of most relationships, unless a partner is asexual or committed to abstention.
But when we talk about allosexuals, sex is not just a big part of relationships – it plays the most major role. In short, allosexuals do not want relationships in which sex plays a minor role. And it’s not a matter of who someone is attracted to; it’s a matter of sexual attraction, no matter “who” might be attached to that attraction.
At first glance, allosexuality does not seem to be a separate identity within the LGBQ+ spectrum. In its simplest form, it refers to those who are sexually attracted to others. And it doesn’t distinguish among any of the common gender identities – gay, lesbian, bi, trans, etc. So, how is it that allosexuals belong in a type of separate category? Well, many claim that they do because they represent a category much like other recognized ones – asexuals, pansexuals, and such. But this really is a minor and pretty much irrelevant discussion. It is enough to know that they are people within any gender identity for whom sex pretty much takes the top spot in relationships.
If you intend to date someone who identifies as a member of this minor category, then it is best that you see what you understand about the allosexual and what you must be ready for.
First of all, allosexuals are all about sex and sexual attraction. They are in direct contrast to alloromantics who are focused on romantic and emotional attachments.
Allosexuals may also be quite fluid in their sexual attractions and will act upon them as they wish. This also means that sex has a higher priority than emotional attachments and monogamous partnerships. Of course, this is not to say that every allosexual rejects monogamous relationships – plenty are and remain loyal to those relationships. Still, even in those, sex remains a high priority.
Be prepared for the following:
have crushes on other people and engage in sex, based only on that attraction
have sexual fantasies about specific people they have encountered
enter into a sexual relationship based solely on physical attraction and nothing more.
If you are the jealous type, you are not a good candidate for a relationship with an allosexual – You will probably be miserable
Sex should take a top role for you in dating an allosexual. Be sure you are ready for this.
Remember, allosexuals do enter into monogamous and romantic relationships. So, if this is what you are looking for, then take heart. You can have a long-term partnership with such a person so long as sex is toward the top of your agenda too. And remember, too, that allosexuals do get out of bed to pursue other interests too. They hold jobs, have careers, may participate in their communities in various ways, and can be very social.
Also, remember that all allosexuals are not promiscuous. While many of them do prefer sexual hookups to longer relationships, this is also among other groups within the LGBTQ+ community at large. If they are getting sexual satisfaction where they are, they will not go elsewhere.
Allosexuals put a high priority on sex and sexual attraction in their relationships. Those who date allosexuals need to ensure that their date is sexually attracted to them and that they can meet their sexual needs and wants. If this is you, then you can be in for a great relationship and some great sex.
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